October 2009

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Seinfeld, they said, was a show about nothing. However, it covered everything – the minutae of life, from bakery line etiquette to favourite t-shirts to soup. But one thread that ran right through its nine seasons was sport.

Jerry Seinfeld himself is a sports fan, of course, a New Yorker whose allegiance is firmly with the Mets while co-creator and executive producer Larry David is a Yankees man. So is George Costanza, of course, who is more or less based on the Curb Your Enthusiasm star.

They say there’s a Superman reference in every episode – either verbal or visual – but there’s twice as many sports allusions.

Joe Sports Guy has vowed to chronicle every sporting reference in the show, starting with baseball. And because I like making lists as much as the next man, here’s my top three. Read the rest of this entry »

…because these guys are shrewd. The Corrigan brothers released that song about ‘Barry O’Bama’ last year and showed up Forrest Gump-like at his inauguration.

Now they’ve unleashed ‘Here’s to Trapattoni’ on the unsuspecting world. If the IMF come in to make sure thre country doesn’t sink into the Atlantic in the next few months, expect a catchy little ditty about chief economist Olivier Blanchard or ‘Give it a Lash, EU Commission President, Jose Manuel Barosso’ perhaps.

But, on the morning that Trap annouces his squad for the play-offs with France, I agree with the – horribly produced – sentiments.

I came across this on the Knicks website this week ahead of their opening NBA game with Miami. Check it out – they ask the squad for their favourite songs – or as they put it ‘the greatest song ever made’. Just like Monday Night Soccer, some even sing to illustrate the point.

Let me, if you will, allow me to be Simon Cowell for a moment.

First of all, the dude is dead. He was the King of Pop. I get it. But Michael Jackson is now disproportionately represented amongst basketball’s hot young talent. It’s not what he would have wanted.

Danillo Gallinari? The Jay-Z/Rihanna combo? I wasn’t waiting on that one. It’s like Ronan O’Gara going for a Wu Tang joint.

Finally, Nate ‘Kryptonite’ Robinson is the only one who came out with a bit of credit. He picked some classic hip-hop that he obviously genuinely loves. Thoughts, anyone?

Big in Japan

I stayed up late to watch the first game of the World Series last night in the Bronx. Some excellent stuff as the Phillies were untouchable but there was nothing like this pitch from a player in Japan which has surfaced this week.

Feeling Chippy

Ireland assistant manager Liam Brady says the Boys In Green have nothing to fear from their upcoming World Cup playoff with France – insisting it’s time to end a ‘tradition of failure’ against Les Bleus.

“We have played against France so many times in the World Cup, that this game was always written. When playing, I faced France during the qualifying phase for World Cups in ‘78 and ‘82 and we also faced them in 2006.

“We always meet on the way to the World Cup. Unfortunately for us, we have always failed. But always by very little. Time has come for that tradition to end.”

Ireland welcome Raymond Domenech’s side to Croke Park on November 14 before travelling to Paris for the return leg four days later. But Brady, speaking in an interview in today’s edition of France Football magazine, says hosting the first leg is no real disadvantage.

“Playing the first leg won’t have that much importance. I have seen so many return games won by teams away from home. This is no advantage to France. Actually, the last time we qualified for a World Cup in 2002 was after playing the return leg in Iran. Our performances during the qualifying phase, the fact that we were close to winning our group has created a climate of confidence in the whole country. Ok, we will play France. But we don’t fear them. We always feel better as outsiders. This is in our blood. Read the rest of this entry »

The NBA have banned subs from standing up court-side so the Lakers have come up with this intead. Check out Josh Powell on the end who clearly missed a team meeting during the week and isn’t up to speed on the new custom.

[Thanks to Sport is a TV Show]

Here in Cork, as my colleague Blake Creedon says, jazz is a verb. This weekend sees Leeside host the 31st Jazz Festival.

France’s football manager and bebop enthusiast Raymond Domenech, pictured in customary moustache, is taking some time out from preparations for the upcoming World Cup playoff clash with Ireland to particpate.

Domenech – with his band, Zizou Top – brings his distinctly Gallic take on an ambitious and tempermental Chicago-New Orleans crossover, fusion to the Metropole Hotel on MacCurtain St this very Sunday afternoon.

But word is the supperstitious, barely-competent gaffer will join old friend Don Baker in a surprise appearance at the back of Counihans on Saturday night. Niiice.

Asked if he’d attend, his counterpart, Ireland manager Giovanni Trapattoni offered a 25-minute explanation in three languages, explaining how classical music is what he has always listened to and he wouldnt be changing now, he doesnt have the team to play jazz, why do you keep asking about jazz, it is not personal and jazz is for the devil.

Magic Johnson and Isiah Thomas – who famously greeted each other with this on-court kiss before the 1988 NBA Finals – are, I’m sorry to report, fueding.

The former Laker has critiicised his former friend in a new book he co-wrote with Larry Bird about the memorable LA-Boston rivalry to be released soon.

Much of their story involves Thomas, who as Detroit Pistons skipper was the primary threat to the championship ambitions of Bird’s Celtics and Magic’s Lakers. The book offers revelations that have stunned Thomas.

According to Sports Illustrated:

Magic addresses years of rumors by finally accusing Thomas of questioning his sexuality after Johnson was diagnosed with HIV in 1991. Magic also admits that he joined with Michael Jordan and other players in blackballing Thomas from the 1992 Olympic Dream Team, saying, “Isiah killed his own chances when it came to the Olympics. Nobody on that team wanted to play with him. … Michael didn’t want to play with him. Scottie [Pippen] wanted no part of him. Bird wasn’t pushing for him. Karl Malone didn’t want him. Who was saying, ‘We need this guy?’ Nobody.”
Magic’s most shocking accusation, however, is that Thomas was responsible for spreading rumors that Johnson was gay or bisexual after Johnson tested positive for HIV, forcing his retirement at age 32. “Isiah kept questioning people about it,” Magic says. “I couldn’t believe that. The one guy I thought I could count on had all these doubts. It was like he kicked me in the stomach.”
Thomas vehemently denied that he had gossiped behind Magic’s back, pointing out that he knew better than to engage in such hurtful talk.


Fair play to Cork goalkeeper Donal Óg Cusack who yesterday confirmed in a newspaper interview that he’s gay.

This is no real shock, it has to be said, to anyone with an interest in hurling but for a guy who is still playing – and a goalkeeper – in the ultra-conservative world of GAA this takes some balls.

The country explodes in celebration, the recession is cancelled, the world applauds. Meanwhile, back in Montrose…

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“Ireland did not win the World Cup! No football team won this tournament, Bill.

[Raising voice to talk over three other pundits now wearing comedy green hats with clapping hands on the peak] This so-called football tournament was dragged into the Stygian darkness of Satan’s anti-football by our representitives.

“I’m not saying Trapattoni has done a bad job but we should be ashamed of ourselves for celebrating this – the final nail in the coffin of this beautifaul sport.

“Real football people will bloody well know how I feel. Real fooball people. [while he jabs a pen at Kenny Cunningham]

“The faceless corporate war mongerers who ran this bloody circus are laughing all the way to the bank. Bread and fucking circuses, eh Gilesey?

[throws the pen at Ronnie Whelan’s head] “How dare they serve up a binary, industrial, mechanical, art-less scoreline. 1-0? 1-0?! Football is art, music, theatre on, this, our biggest stage. Argentina played football wrapped in silk. Trap sent our poor lads out to play in dirty cotton.

This performance [aggressively punching quotation marks in the air] is an Orwellian nightmare from which I am yet to wake. Big Brother is watching. Big bollixing Brother. Big pricking, bollixing Brother.

“Well no. No! Two and two – Gilesy will tell ye too, he went to Synge St – two and two is four. This World Cup has disgraced the nation.

“Hyperbole? Ah Bill, jaysus. We’re a fucking laughing stock, Bill.”

Glenn-Whelan-001

Ted: I think it might work, Dougal. I know it’ll work. It will work.
Dougal: It won’t work, will it Ted?
Ted: …It won’t, no.

I’m just back from Dublin after amazing night at Croke Park. We didn’t win. But we’re into the play-offs and I don’t think anyone will want to come to Drumcondra after last night.

Winning ugly

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When Michael Jonzon, above, closed out the Castello Masters in Spain last month with an 18-foot birdie, the title secured his European Tour card. But he also won a more tangible trophy. The pictures in the newspapers on Monday morning showed the Swede kissing an oak-coloured sculpture of a man with a ball on his head and smile on his face. And this, these days, is not the weirdest prize in sports today.
Read the rest of this entry »

Phil-Taylor-001

What do you ask the man who’s won everything? Phil Taylor, a middle-aged darts player from the middle of England might not look it – and he doesn’t – but after 13 world titles, he walks with sporting giants.

Better known, of course, as The Power, the current PDC kingpin, is sitting across from me in a Dublin hotel, sipping carefully on a herbal tea and absent-mindedly flicking lint from his show-time blue-and-white, nickname-emblazoned shirt, which is hung from the back of a chair.

Early yesterday morning I slipped from my bed at 5.30 (there’s one in the morning too?!), got on the road to the capital, and brimming with nerves, made my way to a date with destiny – I was promised the chance to take on Taylor at the oche.

But how does one train for a tilt at this windmill? Darts stars, once renowned for drinking a small child’s weight in alcohol during games, usually dripping with cheap gold-looking jewellery and inked with crude tattoos, no longer fill the stereotype quite so comfortably. So a quiet weekend is out of the question ahead of our meeting.

Regardless of preparation however, like so many young hopefuls on the circuit, The Power delivered a sharp, short shock to my aspirations.

The thousand-yard stare which greeted me in the hotel lobby not only communicated that a) it didn’t matter that I forgot to bring arrows, as he’d not be swinging an arm in anger this morning b) never – remember this – approach darts’ nocturnal superstars at an hour when breakfast is still being served and c) Taylor and the world’s great athletes like Woods, Schumacher and, indeed, Keane are certainly at home in the same madhouse.

“I like Roy, he’s a winner,” Taylor says after we settle down for a chat in a seat rather than in front of a board, while Eric Bristow is around the corner perusing a front-page newspaper story about druids cursing the Ipswich Town manager.

Despite Taylor’s insistence that he ‘likes’ Keane, he tells a story that betrays the red-hot motivation that smoulders even now after so many years of success in his field. After winning the big prize for an unprecedented and wholly impressive eight years in a row, the Stoke-on-Trent man lost in 2003 to John Part. Though the wound was still raw, Taylor accepted an invitation to tour Manchester United’s Carrington training complex some weeks later. Ushered into the gym as the champions went through their warm down, Taylor was introduced to the group. “Lads, say hello to Phil Taylor, eight-time darts world champion.”

“Former world champion,” interjected Keane from an over-worked exercise bike that billowed smoke into the Neville brothers’ faces.

The barb, which prompted a chorus of giggles from the United players, certainly stung Taylor’s still-raw ego. But Taylor filed it under ‘M‘ for motivation and went back to win four more titles since. He can appreciate a champion’s obsessive-compulsive relationship with success. Read the rest of this entry »

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I’m just back from chatting with Phil ‘The Power’ Taylor.

Check out tomorrow’s column in the Irish Examiner to find out which one of us drinks herbal tea and our plans for the future.

To clarify, that’s Phil on the right.

A Hollywood tale

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I had a had a chat with Ireland legend Damien Duff during the last international break about Subbutteo, Florence and the Machine and, I’m not ashamed to say, one of my favourite TV shows, Entourage.

The HBO sitcom – which revolves around a young film actor and his friends in Hollywood – is peppered every year with plenty of celebrity cameos and the world of sport (look out for LeBron in the season finale later this year) is always well represented.

So here, in case the Duffer is browsing his favourite blog in a Dublin hotel today ahead of the Italy game on Saturday, is my top five sports star walk-ons on Entourage. Read the rest of this entry »

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